New York State of Mind

Hello,
I am home from the center of the universe.
The metropolis.

I am 'home',
but I feel more at home
in the city,
safe and singular
and home.

Don't get me wrong,
I love my house and my family,
but I soul just rested easier
in the city.

And now I'm at a loss.
There is too much space
and not enough stuff.

There are no trains to ride
to put me to sleep.
No people to watch,
no pigeons to follow.

No great green parks
to sit and drink tea in.
No pleasant strangers.

I know what I'm doing now.

I know where I'll be.

And I can see myself very easily
in that place.

And I miss it,
really.
I am back for only a few hours
but I am already missing it.

I am envisioning a future
of a sunny apartment
above a little grocery
with a windowbox for flowers.

I am envisioning subway rides.
Alone.
Or with him.

I am imagining nights out in college.
The neon and crooked sidewalks.

I want to live in the heart of the world,
because I will love and be loved there.

Here,
in some years,
I will leave my front window open in the brisk night,
my bed dressed in white linens, as the trees rustle in the breeze,
dogs are walked below, and the cars shuffle by.
Where there are always lights on, but I can still see the moon.
And he will be brushing his teeth in the tiny bathroom, 
and I will be in a thin robe,
waiting to go to bed.

Here,
is my life as
I want it.